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HELEN McGHIE – DOVE FEBRUARY 2010
Dove Wellington was privileged to have as their February guest speaker Associate Pastor/Counsellor Helen McGhie of Riverstones AOG Church.
Helen’s entertaining talk on ‘choices’ touched and spoke to the hearts of many of women present and this is just a brief summary of some of the points she made.
We all have choices. All of us want something better for ourselves – to move on and do more – but what is it that stops us? The key to enjoying a better life is making choices that are going to lead us there. It’s moving on, growing and maturing in the things of God. The following are some of the choices highlighted by Helen that we all need to make that will empower us to be strong in the Lord and move on.
First we have to choose God’s love. We choose to believe there is a God that knows us perfectly and that He loves us unconditionally. He may not like our behaviour or attitude (that will have to be dealt with) but He loves us unconditionally. God has promised that all of those who look for him will find him. We have to believe in the reality of God’s love, no matter what we have done in the past. We need to embrace his love and thank him for it and our identity in it. Let His love fill us with confidence.
Secondly we need to choose to accept God’s forgiveness for the bad choices we’ve made in the past. We need to let go of the guilt and dark clouds hanging over us and move on. When we truly accept God’s forgiveness it brings healing.
While briefly mentioning the childhood abuse she suffered and her promiscuous teenage years, Helen reflected that her healing has never wiped out the vivid memory of those situations, but she does remember them without pain, without shame, without condemnation and without guilt. She has been forgiven and she is healed and cleansed. The past is remembered so that she might show others the way of the Lord, and that she might be sensitive to their feelings and what they are going through and what they have experienced. It is not the healing of the memories that are wiped out - it is the healing of the pain of the memories as we receive God’s forgiveness. We make a choice to accept His love His forgiveness.
Choose to forgive others. We have a limited capacity to go forward in life without the freedom that comes from forgiveness. In Matthew 18.18 Jesus says ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven’ and in Matthew 18.21.22 in answer to Peter’s question re forgiveness Jesus says ‘I tell you not seven times, but seventy times seven’. What is He saying here? ‘He is saying that there are times in our lives when we have someone that hurts, offends or abuses us - and what we bind on earth will be bound in heaven. So if you hang onto this person who has hurt you saying ‘you owe me an apology, you owe me an explanation’ – what you bind on earth is bound in heaven. God can’t move in this person’s life and he is limited in what he can do in our lives because we are all bound up with unforgiveness towards this person. But what you loose on earth is loosed in heaven. It doesn’t mean that what that person did to you was OK or is alright. It does mean that you are not going to stay in bondage to that pain and hurt. You are moving on by saying ‘I forgive you’. But what do we mean when we say ‘I forgive you’? A lot of people can’t explain forgiveness. Forgiveness means I make a choice to set you free from my judgment. I will not judge or criticise you for what you did to me. I’m moving on and I will not remind you of what you did to me. I make a choice to give up my right for revenge. I make a choice to release you and set you free. Now what I’ve loosed on earth will be loosed in heaven and God can move in that person’s life and can also move with freshness in our life. It’s a huge step in our Christian walk, but it’s something God doesn’t do for us. It’s something that we have to choose to do. And we have to forgive our brothers from our hearts (Matt. 18.35).
We need to learn the principle of forgiveness. Is that why so many people are troubled in their minds and bogged down and have been delivered to the tormentor who torments their bodies and their minds with affliction and all sorts of things because they have not learned the principle of forgiveness? (See Matt.18.34 (KJV) re delivery to the tormentors… and Matt.18.35 so likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if you from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.) And so we make a choice to set ourselves free from that. Bible commentator William Barclay commenting on the book of Matthew says ‘we will never know how to forgive other people until we have had a revelation of our own forgiveness.’
Jesus chose to set you free from His judgment. He makes a choice to not remind you of what you have done. He made a choice to release you and set you free. When we can truly grasp that, we can appreciate and understand the need in our own lives to set others free
Choose to let the word of God lead you. Choose the bible to be God’s love letter to you – what is he saying to you as a mother, wife, and leader. When the bible becomes our authority it changes the direction of our lives and we can never speak the word of God unless we know it. Like a cow chews its cud – chew on the word.
We need to trust God with our future. Accept his invitation to trust him. Transfer your burdens to God through prayer and imagine yourself taking each of your worries to the cross and leaving them there. Ask him to develop character in you as you trust him.
Choose to love your family. Remember that your time and energy is limited and don’t wear yourself out serving others, even for a good cause, to the point that you cannot serve your own family. Express your love to your family, speak positive words over them.
Choose to be authentic, choose to be real. Close up all the gaps between the person that you say you are and the person that you really are. Take off the masks. Be transparent and honest. Forget about trying to impress others with your piety. Choose to serve and keep in mind that you are ultimately serving Jesus. Humble yourself before God and choose to be salt and light. Hold on in tough times. Every trial is a test of faith. Delight in taking a stand and invite Jesus to transform your life.